Ten Years In The Grand Canyon State

Back when we were younger and thinner, yet still lived in Arizona

 Over the last few days, Nathan and I have been prone to much personal reflection, and also a few bouts of nostalgia. This week (August 20th, to be exact) is the ten-year anniversary of our move to Arizona. Living here for this long was not part of our original "plan"...not my plan, at any rate! Nevertheless, here we are, still happily living in Arizona, and not likely to leave any time soon.

The majority of our married life has been spent in Arizona, and all our children have been born here. It has been humbling and joyous to reflect on all that we've experienced here and what we've learned. I hope my readers forgive a post filled with my reflective ramblings! Here goes...

Nathan and I rose early in the morning on August 20th, 2003, in Springville, Utah. We were prepared for our long drive south to Tucson, along with my brother Ray and Nathan's youngest brother Evan. We had spent the last few days loading up our U-Haul trailer and Nathan's parents' large truck with all our worldly possessions. At this point we bid farewell to my sister Jocelyn Carlin and her family (her husband Paul, and her two young daughters Abigail and baby Elaine). I shed a few tears, but I was eager to leave as well...we had a long drive ahead of us, and I was looking forward to getting the drive over with.

What a long day of driving it was! We traveled caravan-style, with two of us driving our two small cars, and the remaining two people driving the truck. We stopped several times, each time marveling at how much warmer the air around us was getting! The radio in our small white Toyota Tercel gave out during the trip. (It would take over a year for us to scrape up the money to replace the radio, only to have the new radio stolen from the car literally days later. We didn't have a proper radio in the car for over three years!). Even worse, the heavy U-Haul trailer proved almost deadly to the truck; we barely made it over the mountains near Flagstaff, and the truck chugged dangerously the rest of the way after that. After the move, Evan managed to drive the truck back to Colorado safely, but it would ultimately need a new transmission after being strained to the breaking point during our journey.

Moving to Arizona was a huge leap of faith for us. Nathan had just finished his bachelor's degree at BYU, and he'd decided to begin a Master's Degree in Community and Regional Planning at the University of Arizona (in Tucson, located in the south-eastern part of the state). Neither of us had ever lived in Arizona before. We had no family living anywhere in the vicinity. We signed the lease on our apartment sight unseen. One of my college friends, Darlene, had moved to the area with her husband, but they lived in a different part of town and we rarely saw them. Neither of us had full-time jobs of any kind lined up. It was to be a new beginning of sorts, one that would require us to start from the ground up.

Those first few months in Tucson were incredibly hard. Nathan discovered that his program was underfunded and not everything he had expected; he struggled to find an ally in the faculty, some of which were openly hostile to him for a number of stupid reasons. I struggled to find a job, and had to settle for a temporary assignment that offered no health insurance. We lived exclusively off student loans and miniscule paychecks for months. We were blindsided financially a number of times: by the massive power bills (turns out, setting your A/C to the low 70s in an Arizona summer will cost you a pretty penny!); by our auto insurance (which was twice as high as what we'd paid when we lived in UT); and by the university, which moved Nathan's program into another college department, thus causing him to lose his scholarship through no fault of his own. In one semester, our entire savings were wiped out.

I remember crying a lot that first fall. We both got depressed by the summer that never seemed to end; by the time that first November rolled around I was cursing the sunny warm weather and disoriented by the monotonous passage of time. Every time a new expense came up, we fretted endlessly. There were several nights when, rather than going on a romantic date, we stayed home and clung to each other in solace, desperately hoping to "hug" ourselves out of our black mood.

During this time of isolation, we discovered the true meaning of the Biblical command for the husband and wife to "cleave unto each other." Without family or friends (at first), we only had each other. We leaned on each other so much for emotional, financial, and spiritual support. We faced adversity together and grew stronger and wiser for it. We learned a lot about problem-solving and conflict resolution without having to depend on anyone else to "moderate" our efforts. Our love for each other grew, as did our faith in our Father in Heaven, who managed to help us out in many ways, great and small.

More "leaps of faith" followed our initial move. There were several months where we didn't know whether to pay tithing or rent. We chose tithing every time, and every time we were blessed and supported, with our financial needs being met. We desperately wanted to start our family, but didn't know how we could afford to do so. After praying and fasting, we decided to go ahead and get started anyway, trusting the Lord would provide a way. And so He did...the very next day after our decision was made, I received a job offer at Davis Kitchens, a local kitchen remodeling company. It wasn't high-paying or glamorous, but it more than met our needs.

Here's a bunch of our "little friends" from our Tucson ward

Our home ward (the Palo Verde Ward, in the Tucson East Stake) became an invaluable source of love and support. I was called to serve in the Primary; after some initial fears, I came to dearly love the children in the ward, and happily served them for years. Nathan and I both served in Primary for a time, and later as ward missionaries, where we learned the joys of preaching the gospel to souls seeking the truth. The Palo Verde Ward boundaries included all the military families living in the nearby Air Force base, and a few other student families as well. As a result, we got to bond with many families like ours...families far from their original homes, struggling to adjust to a new place, and eager to bond with people in like circumstances. We made many wonderful friends in our ward, and they provided some of the brightest points during our first few difficult years.

Just under two years after moving to Arizona, our first child, Lorelai was born. Her birth brought its own challenges; besides the usual poopy diapers and sleepless nights, both of us had to work full-time for a few months when she was still very small. In addition, Nathan was in the midst of a very difficult semester at school which tested him academically and emotionally. In spite of that, Lorelai filled us with so much joy and love; she was truly a gift worth waiting for. It was very hard to leave her and go to work every day, but she was such a good-natured, sweet baby that it made our sacrifices easier. She was the perfect child for us at that time in our lives.

Slowly but surely, we adapted to our life in Arizona. We learned, grew, and improved our situation. After two stressful years in school, Nathan took a year off to work full-time and regroup...only to return a couple of years later, write his new dissertation, and receive his Master's Degree. He was fortunate enough to get a job as a planner in the San Xavier District of the Tohono O'odham Indian Reservation. Like my job before it, his planner job wasn't overly glamorous, but it was a perfect fit for our lives at the time. He learned much more about what it meant to be a city planner; he worked hard and helped push through many valuable projects that benefited the community he served. He was able to support our family, and make a name for himself.

 

After more than five years with the District, Nathan was offered a planner's job at the Pima Association of Governments, an organization that facilitates planning operations throughout the county. He was well-prepared for the opportunity, and because of his new job, we have been able to feel more "settled" than at any time before in Arizona.

After our beautiful second daughter Celeste was born, we said goodbye to our home in Tucson, and moved south to Sahuarita. For three years, we rented a small but cozy house. Shortly after moving in, my loving parents shipped their piano from Colorado...the same piano I'd learned to play on in my childhood. Now, I began to teach piano lessons of my own; it has been a great way to stay busy and earn a little extra while staying home with the kids. We thought of buying a house right away...but here the Lord intervened again, prompting us to wait a while. And so we did, which enabled us to buy a home later, at a better price than we'd have been able to do previously.

Nathan's parents followed us to Arizona in 2009 when his father retired; now we are blessed to have grandparents living nearby that our girls can get to know. In early 2010, our third daughter Aurora was born; it made our house a little crowded, but filled with love and cuteness. Just over a year after that, thanks to the good timing and helpfulness of Nathan's parents, we were able to purchase a home larger than we'd previously thought possible, one that should keep our family happy and well-protected for many years to come.

After five-plus years in Sahuarita, we've come to love our ward here just as much as the Palo Verde Ward in Tucson. We've been blessed to know many great families and friends, who have taught us much and with whom we've had lots of fun. We've served in many different callings in our ward; I've spent most of my time in Primary, and Nathan has served in the Elders' Quorum presidency, and now serves as Ward Mission Leader. Our kids have made many close friends in Sahuarita; in our ward, in the surrounding neighborhoods, in school, in their extracurricular activities. This has been a wonderful city in which to raise our sweet kids; we are so fortunate and blessed to call Sahuarita home.

All this is a far cry from our arrival in Arizona ten years ago. At the time, I was adamant that we only stay here for two years! I was terrified of the heat, the desert, the giant bugs, the deadly plants & animals, the wide-open spaces, the crime, the long distance from an LDS temple (currently, our nearest is 100 miles north, in Mesa). And while the heat still scares me (heck, it kind of scares most Arizonans, if we're being honest), I have discovered so many other things to love about this state. The harsh but breathtaking natural beauty. The mellow, warm winters. The beautiful, plentiful canyons. The annual Rodeo. The awesome swimming pools & water parks. The many fascinating historical sites nearby. The fantastic Mexican food. The (mostly harmonious) blending of cultures. The always-stunning sunsets.

 

 

We've spent much of the last several years exploring our adopted state; we've visited Phoenix many times, and we've seen much in southern Arizona as well. But we know that there is still a lot left in Arizona to explore (it is a big state, after all!). That's okay, though; we aren't leaving any time soon.

 

Some days I think of living in some other state, and no doubt we will live elsewhere in the years to come. For now, though, Arizona is where we belong. I am so grateful for the many years of sacrifice and learning we've been through here; I am so grateful for the many amazing people we've met here and the friendships we've forged here; I am so grateful for the incredible sights we've seen here and the adventures we've experienced. Thanks for all the memories, Grand Canyon State...here's hoping for many more!